"Thinking back on Christmases past"

 Well, despite all the excitement and commotion, and suggesting that everyone say Merry Christmas, and even saying it a few times myself.... I just cannot get into the mood, at all, this year.  This is our 1st year we have not been in our home, in Buford, where we spent many Christmases.....  decorated, inside and out, sometimes had more than one tree, and SNOWMEN filled the house, everywhere... I wrote Christmas cards, and delighted at all the ones we got, usually taping them to the door frame in the foyer into the great room, getting excited when pictures were included so we could see the kids from our friends, and loved ones, and how they had grown. There were years that I even baked cookies and made candy, and hot cocoa mix for gifts. I ran around shopping for the perfect thing for everyone (although there really is no such thing) making sure they were all wrapped to a tee, and the wrapping bags, which I later used mostly, had just the right bit of tissue poking out the top, here and there, so it would look "perfect".  In the early years when the girls were young, I did the "room mother" thing, and made cute little bells, out of teeny tiny clay pots turned upside down, hand lettering each little precious kids names on them, in gold or silver... oh if they were a little bit off, well, I just had to make another one and start again.  I also helped make goodies for those school parties, and showed up to help the other room mothers serve the kids and their teachers, when the girls were little.   As they grew older, I ran all over the place making sure I had enough, of "just the right thing" to go into their stockings for each of them, as that seemed to be one of the gifts they enjoyed the best!  I threatened not to keep doing it, but they balked, so I kept on, and on... and that makes me happy.  We always had dinner at our house, either in Duluth, or Buford, so I cooked a big dinner, everyone brought something, and we all ate together, sometimes including other family and friends to join us.  One of my favorite things to do, almost everyday, was just sit and look at our Christmas tree...with the lights, twinkling, the collection of ornaments, that were hung every year.  We even had 3 of the 4 gold plastic angels that hung on our very first little tree at Myrtle Beach. The years brought on bigger trees, and more ornaments... filled with memories, and I would go around looking and remembering at each one of them, making sure they were in just the right spot, adjusting where needed. 

We have a tiny little tree here, with one little string of 20 lights, a few tiny sand dollars, and some bows tied on the limbs.  It is right cute, but we have not gotten it out.  No wreaths are hung.... no cards have either been sent or received.  (E-mail, or fb seems to be the preferred choice of communication these days, so sadly less people send them anymore.)  

Anyway, that is how my season this Christmas has been going... kind of in a fog, thinking back to the Christmases past, and longing for those days, in a way again.  But I know we cannot go back, so we will continue going forward.... Thank goodness for the memories and all the pictures that we took... Maybe I will look for the ones of our latest Christmases, in our home, and maybe that will help get me in the mood.  And..... maybe I can get Mr. T. to pull that little tiny tree outta the closet, and set it on the table and plug it in too! Just a few little lights, but they might help my spirit glow......

Realizing that none of those things that I aforementioned makes Christmas, or what it is truly all about, as I know that Christmas really is, or should be, a time of celebrating the Birth of our Christ. 
I need to get real quiet and think about that, and maybe that will help me get the REAL spirit of Christmas back in my heart..... 

THINGS I STILL WANT TO DO....

Good Mornin' y'all! .... Ain't God good?  Well, HE surely is!  He certainly has been to ME quite a bit lately.... He's been listening very well, to my prayers, and the prayers of others said on my behalf, and is blessing me in so many, many ways.... through Friends, I've never met, and an openness to some strangers along my way these past few weeks.  In these times, I know it is not safe to hardly look at another person that ya don't know, but sometimes that is just what God wants us to do....to give them a smile, or hold open a door for them, or praise the one who has on a WWII hat... and thank him for his service.  In sooooo many ways, God has been speaking to me quite a bit lately. And through his non-words I am getting His messages.  I am beginning to let go, and let GOD, as the saying says.  I know that this is not happening alone, as I know that I have others praying for me, and lifting me up to the Lord, and asking for His hand to be upon me, to show me the things HE wants me to know... I am getting the feed-back from the Lord, loud and clearly for a change!  Maybe because I am reeeeally LISTENING this time?  I don' t know, possibly, but I am not going to OVER-THINK it either, just continue to stay "in tune", keeping my "channels" clear, so there won't be static in the way that I have to try and decipher through.  Nothing worse than a radio station that you can hear a little bit, but because of the static, you cannot get it to tune in very clearly... y'all know what I mean... I know ya do. Well, I am relating this feeling I have been getting lately from the Lord, in that same way..... but I plan to keep my channels open and tuned in!  Sometimes I think about my age, and all of the things that I wish I HAD done, and think gosh, now I'm too old, or maybe it is too late, to make a new beginning, or to try something new.... and then I stop myself, and have to remind myself, it is never too late, until it IS TOO LATE!  ...... You know what that means, so I won't spell that out.  I hope and I pray that I have quite a few more days on this Earth, but I do not know how many there are, but God knows... and HE knows what I still have in my heart's desire to do yet.  I am sooooooooooooo (and then some) THANKFUL.... that HE has once again opened up this door of WRITING back to me, and helped me to see, that although I don't have a perfect "place" to do my PAINTING, that lo and behold, I CAN also do that... just by being a bit inventive, and thinking outside of the box....and willing to be able to do these things in SPITE OF, not having the "room" to do them.... but hey.... I am here, I have a roof over me, and I have all the supplies I need, so HE just said to me the other day.... GO FOR IT LYNN!  Make it happen!  HE was probably telling me.... you can, IF you don't look at the "obstacles"!   So I didn't really even THINK of those obstacles, when I threw that old towel and new rubber bath mat onto a side of the bed!  Then went into my various Bins and Boxes, and started pulling things out that I would need to get started... amazed at ALL THE STUFF I have... been just saving it up for the RIGHT PLACE!  Humph... never will I have a RIGHT PLACE, but I have made me a spot... and gotten a start... and am GUNG-HO to keep on the roll that I feel I am on. Keeping in mind that certainly not by myself, have I been able to do any of this.... in fact this writing here on my "BLOG" was reeeally encouraged to me by my dear friend, whom I dearly call "Glory"... because she IS a GLORY to ME!  Sooo here I am now, writing my words, probably rambling on and on, about this or that, and not worrying about the "correctness" of it much, so I can just get the words out and typed.  IF at any time, none of it makes sense, or it's too much for ya.... you can stop reading, and I'll never know!  Unless you choose to tell me that is, and that's ok too, if you have any constructing criticism for me... I'll take it!  But... back to the subject...  I have begun WRITING again, thanks to Glory and to God, of course as well!  And.... THEN.... wowie zowie, I got out my paints and stuff and made my own little "Bed Studio" and began to paint.... I have some wonderful ideas in my head, and now that is about all I want to do.... Soooo that being said, I guess I need to quit writing right now, so that I can get up and get to painting again.... I am hoping that through some of my creations, a Life may be touched, someone might feel some encouragement, or Peace.... I have lots of ideas to invoke these things, hopefully, into my painting...  I feel that I don't want to JUST paint, but that I can make a DIFFERENCE possibly, with WHAT I paint, and HOW it is presented.  I will be working on it, and I will be writing about the progresses from time to time...... Ahhhh yes, two of the most favorite things I have always liked to do, but never done enough of it, as I wish I had... WRITING and PAINTING....  soooo no holds barred, watch out y'all, I am going to head out full steam and see what God can work in me, through me, so that I can give HIM back all of the praise and glory HE deserves.... let's see what  happens.... Y'all ready to come along with me.....????  Let's GO!  ~LBD  

THE BLESSINGS LIST...

Good mornin' y'all.... Today I would like to make a Blessings List.  Last night at our church meeting our pastor was talking to us about the committment we should be willing to make to our church and therefore to the Lord.  He reitereated that after ALL that HE has done for us, should we not be willing to give up, just a very few hours in proportion, of our week, back to HIM?  Hmmmm..... well, now there is a thought!  AND.... our pastor also made us think about this.... that by being a Church Member we are a part of a "team" if you will.  He compared it with being a player on a football team, and how if one of those players are missing how much impact it has on the team as a WHOLE.   Hmmmm.....ya know, he had a point there.  How can I not, give him back ohhhh, what.... approximately only 3 hours a week, when HE has given so much MORE to me.... ALL of my LIFE.... for instance?  Wow.  compare that .... CAN YOU?  3 hours.... an entire LIFE?  Okay, so I totally get that perspective.  Loud and clear!~  Now, Pastor Ron wasn't saying all of this to make us feel bad, if we are not in "our places", at church when we should be, but to help us to see that not only are we being a team player, but we are not there to receive the MANY BLESSINGS THAT GOD HAS FOR US DURING THOSE TIMES.  Reeeally?  Well, right then, I thought back to the times when I wasn't in my place there, meaning that I stayed home from church, for one reason or another.... and my sweet friend, Dottie, would always send me a text (or fb message, or call, whatever) and say those SAME WORDS to me... You missed your blessings.... I'm sorry you couldn't be there, because you missed your blessings!  WELL.... wonder what those blessings were?  Hmmmm..... I will never know because I was not there, to receive them.  I wasn't in my place, at my church, being a PART of that church family, holding up MY end of  "the rope".  Hmmmm.....  Now when putting it that way... I have to ask myself, why wouldn't I want to receive any of God's blessings?  Life is really waaaay to short to miss even ONE of those.  Yes it is!   

Soooo.... I come back to The Blessings List... that another friend, asked all of her friends on fb this morning, to make!  Think of all the many things that you feel God has BLESSED YOU WITH, and write them down!  I am going to.  But felt the need and desire to share these words here with you before I go to do that.  BECAUSE believe it or not, I am feeling like a blessing myself....  Really?  Did I just say that?  THAT I CAN BE A BLESSING???   Well, why not?  THAT is exactly what God would want me (or you, or you, or YOU!) to be to those along Life's way we meet.  

Yes, I will write that list, but before I WRITE THE THINGS I AM BLESSED WITH..... let me see if  I CAN WRITE THE WAYS IN WHICH I CAN BE A BLESSING..... Hmmmm..... now THERE really is a thought, huh?  Yes, I have accepted God, in my heart, a long time ago, and now not so long ago, I have joined this church, of whom I wanted to be a part of, but yet how can I be a blessing, if I am not there, at that church, whenever the doors are open, to receive the BLESSINGS GOD HAS FOR ME????   I figure if I am to BE a Blessing, I need to GET FILLED UP with the Blessings God has in store for me.   

Hmmmm....it all seems to go hand in hand, and comes back around full circle, when you think about it.  So, this morning, before I get to writing my own BLESSINGS LIST, (because I know in my heart really by now, what they are, and I could be here all day writing that list!).... maybe, just maybe it is TIME for me to make a Blessings List, of ways that I CAN BE A BLESSING!  I really think that that is what GOD is asking of me today.... He is saying, maybe... "Now Lynn, my dear, you KNOW all of the things I have done for you, you REMEMBER all of the times that I was THERE for you, and you surely can THINK of ways now, that YOU can be a BLESSING.  Don't you?  Soooo I think for you today, my dear Lynn, it is time for you to make a list that shows ways that YOU CAN give back, and BE a blessing." ..... Hmmmm.... now THERE is a thought!  
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Dear Heavenly Father.....Thank you Lord for helping me to realize this morning, that my Blessings List is long, and plentiful, and help me to remember that without YOU, I would be nothing.  BUT WITH YOU, I can be ALOT of things.... things that would bring joy to me, to my family and friends, and also a BLESSING to SOMEONE else... in some way!  So Lord, I will concentrate on that today... and I pray YOU will show me the ways, and help me to break out of my comfort zone, if need be, to do just that!  Help me Oh Lord, to focus not on the things that need to be done around here, with these boxes or this STUFF, but to realize that TIME is short, and I need to use the Blessings you have given me, in order that I might be able to share them with others, in some way.  That is my prayer this morning, Lord.  And I want to THANK YOU for the people you have put into my path at this time of my life, that have been a blessing to me, in order to help me see that me, little 'ole me, can  DO SOMETHING, to give back to YOU!  Thank you Jesus, and I thank you for loving me and forgiving me of all of my sins, and giving me of your bountiful GRACE daily.  In Jesus holy name.  ~Amen. 

THE PARADOX OF OUR TIME.

“The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but
shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more,
but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and
smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees
but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more
problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little,
drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too
little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our
possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and
hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to
life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but
have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer
space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom,
but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but
accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more
computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we
communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small
character, steep profits and shallow relationships.

These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but
broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway
morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything
from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the
showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can
bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share
this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember, to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not
going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks
up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave
your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the
only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most
of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from
deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person might
not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to
share the precious thoughts in your mind.”

― Bob Moorehead

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That was the prelude to the sermon that Brother Ron had for us today, this Sunday, August 11, 2013.  The title of this sermon was "Getting Your Mind Right" (1Peter 1:13-16)    Apart from God, we are nothing, apart from God, nothing much matters.  

The Need for Sleep

Very sleepy-eyed, 
tired body,
so give out.

As I feel the need
for sleep, 
I fight it 
even still.

Why won't I let it 
take me, 
far beyond 
the clouds, 
where the shrouds
disappear
and I never have to fear.

Sleep to me never 
comes easy, 
and when it does
I fight it. 

okay, I give.
Goodnight. Goodmornin'. 
whatever time it is. 
Sleep... I'm here!

Good mornin' y'all....

"Good mornin' y'all"... my first words on fb nearly everyday....  

Followed by a bit of friendly advice, or something someone else has shared.  A picture, some lines of scripture, or a thought or two. Some words to hopefully encourage me or you, and hopefully make our days a little bit brighter.  When I type those words, on my facebook page, I try to put a smile on my face, and make my spirit light and sunny, and hope that I never come off sounding fake, but I don't mind if I do sound funny.  Funny and crazy is what I like to be.  To make people laugh, even if it makes sometimes a fool of me.... what the heck, it is okay, as long as it makes for you, a happier, light-hearted day.

We all have struggles in our lives, and we carry burdens that are very heavy at times, but why do we need to share those with EVERYone?  We really don't.  People like to hear about, and read about, good times, and upbeat, positive things. Of course sometimes they like to know that they (all of us) are not the only ones with troubles, and woes, and for those times, we can let them know they are not alone, though, still in a positive way.  However, in my opinion, our innermost, most personal feelings really are not to be put on a page, that has our name on the top of it, for all of the WORLD (so to speak) to see. Reeeally?  Do you think?  Noooo, I don't, anyhow... that is what we have our closest friends for, those within our innermost inner circle... they DO WANT to know, but even they do not want to feel totally stressed, or over-burdened, by our troubles, and neither do we, with theirs.  

Just sayin' here, I guess... I really don't want to put all of my worst on my fb page (nor do I like to read it on other's) ... I feel it should be a place for a GOOD STORY, maybe a funny joke, or a happy- tear-filled moment, that can touch the hearts of many.  Not a place to air our dirty laundry, for sure, or a place to have a dispute!  We really all are alot alike, though we are so very different and unique. That is truly what makes the world go 'round.... God made us that way for a reason.  Soooo.... let's try to share the goooood stuff, on the "face of our book"... Smile, and be grateful, let others know what we feel, what we have to be thankful for, share a picture of the clouds, or a rainbow, or maybe your sweet fur baby, or (GRAND)child, but keep it light y'all... encourage, uplift, give hope, share faith, bring joy.... thank God, and tell all of those who you love that you do, many times..... it's even okay to get a little sappy once in awhile... it will make your skin tingle, in a good way!  Be brave to share a story where you were touched by an angel, if you want... even Maxine will not mind if you post and re-post her, but just be careful with your words out there.... if they are not good words, they can hurt and bruise someone else, and you may never even know it.  Or you might know it, because it could result in the loss of a friendship, or other relationship!  As most of us have heard growing up, "If you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing at all."... well, that is a good practice to not only live by, but "facebook" by.

You can never be sure how another will "take" the words you write, because words read on a page will never have the infliction that they will when you say them with your voice.... you can only 'hope' that the other one reading your words understands how you mean them, and sometimes they still don't when you try to explain yourself.  Sometimes it might be too late.... you can say I'm sorry, but you can never take back words after they come out, either spoken or written.

So "Good mornin' y'all" ... and just take this little bit of advice, from one who knows... be careful what you "say"--- and have yourself a happy, happy day.  :)   Blessings, <3 ~me

Decisions, Decisions

Why is it so hard for me to make a simple decision?  Why do I always have to look at everything, try out every style, every color, every design?  I cannot even recall what time it was when I got started on designing the background, etc., for my blog page. (yes, designing, though I know it doesn't really look "designed"!)  I had to try practically every one of the designs, and all of the colors, and most of the fonts, then the size of the font.  I just couldn't decide... which color looked best, what style I wanted, then should I choose the sea, the sky, some trees, or the ocean?  Why don't they just give us a hand full of options?  Then it wouldn't take so long to make a decision.  And AFTER all of the time I spent... ok, look around ... and yes ..... THIS  is what I ended up with... composition notebook paper! Reeeeeally?  Yes, really.  I drive my own self crazy when I am out shopping too.  If anyone else is with me well, I usually drive them crazy as well.  Don't even get me started on going to the grocery store.  Oh no.  I haven't the time tonight .... besides I am about to fall over asleep.  Good night y'all.  Tomorrow's another day... but if I have to make any decisions, it will still be the same.  Guess it is one of the quirky things about me. 

UNSHELVED WORDS: From Sixteen to Sixty

UNSHELVED WORDS: From Sixteen to Sixty

A blank page...

It says NEW BLOG.... I click that button... a new page comes up... a blank page.  It is here.  Now.  Waiting for my fingers to start to click.  The keys on the keyboard.  Words rush through my mind... they come through my finger tips, putting words on this "paper"... this screen.  Words that come only from my mind!  MY mind. wow. Mind you, others have had similar thoughts, and sometimes I might think the very same thing that I see others have written... but when this BLANK PAGE appears, and the keys start to click, the words are only mine... MINE.... that come out... and make this blank page fill with WORDS... MY WORDS.  Amazing.  It is to me, anyway.... because my mind I've always felt was not "all that"... for lack of a better way to put it... I've never thought of myself as very smart, intelligent-wise, but I realize I'm not a dummy, either.  BUT STILL... when I see these words start to appear upon this page, I am amazed anew each time, a blank page appears.  Because I know that I can think!  And I can type, or write... whichever the case may be (but preferably type of late, it is so much easier and less painful on my old joints).  But my words come through my fingers, and appear upon a page, for me to read, and whomever else sees them and chooses to.  It is a real gift, one I've always taken for granted, or not thought alot about anyway... I figure everybody can write, but some folks tell me "nooo I cannot., not me".  They just don't realize that they can.  But there are those of us, who just HAVE to write, whether we think we can or not.  We just do.  Oh yes, there are "dry spells" when we seem to be unable to put word-one on said blank page. But I think we really only think of them as such. I am thinking right this minute, that "gee wish now I had written more over these past years, what was I waiting for?:  Well, there were a few years that I did have two daughters to help raise, and lawd there are alot of things that go into raising children, no matter which gender they are.  It takes a big part of your TIME, and you think... I do not have the luxury to sit and write.  So I didn't... many times.  Once in awhile, for a few years, or so, I would wake in the early, early morning, get my coffee, pen, and paper (of many various kinds, or journals, notepad, whatever...they are everywhere.  Thus, a REAL PLUS to have said laptop and a BLOGSPOT to come to now!)... okay, where was I?  Oh yes, I would take my coffee and "writing tools" and head out to the deck out back where I could listen to the birds as they would awaken, in the still quietness of the morning, when I was hoping most everyone else was still asleep... and alot were, maybe some up and getting ready for their day.... but many times on the week-end I had a good bit of QUIET TIME out there.... it was lovely.... The sky would turn from gray gradually to a shade of  blue, then the sun would start to come up and the dew would start to dry out... and the birdies would sing a little louder, or more of them would wake up and get going, and I would write as I sipped my coffee, and enjoyed that time of day, alone, only with my thoughts, and my coffee and my pen and paper, and the birds and the trees... Not that I ever thought that the words I would write would be earth-shaking or life-changing... sometimes I would kind of be "guarded" because I would think, I don't want anyone to ever read this, and think I was crazy, or off-my-rocker, or possibly "over the edge", as some of the stuff my early writing might sound like I was... but gee I really didn't want anyone to read those words. But I continued to put pen to paper and the words came out.  The ones I never wanted anyone to read maybe got trashed, or something.  Some may still be hanging around in some dark dusty box somewhere, and if anyone finds them, and don't really like what I wrote, they can choose not to read it, and can think anything of me that they want... I most likely will not be there to care anymore anyway.  If it were someone reading them, who loved me, I would hope they would sift those words with care, and know that they were just words, my words, and move along.  Maybe toss them in the trash, then if they will. Not to worry, not there no mo' so it's all good.  But then if they read something they liked, and/or wanted to keep all the better.  The words are there, the words are here... saying just what is coming through my mind, out my fingers, onto these keys... typing letters one by one, making words, my words, my thoughts... onto a blank page.  Wow.  

What I see in the Mirror

When I look into the mirror, Lord

this is what I see... 

not the me that You made me, Lord, 

I only see just me.

A Me, I hardly recognize,

for this reason, or another, 

I feel I'm someone different Lord,

someone kinda like my mother.

The bags, beneath my eyelids, Lord,

those circles, dark and swelled,

are just reminders to me Lord, 

that I'm not doing quite so well. 

That girl, this woman, I see there Lord, 

I barely recognize,

Though, as she never grew taller Lord,

she has sure grown 
from side to side.

With hair that's sparse, 

and thinning skin,  

please help her now to realize, Lord
 SHE does still reside within. ....

A different version, 
of herself, dear Lord,
who's older 
by many years, 
a little wiser, yes
she hopes so Lord,  
though, she's still trying
to overcome some fears.   

Thoughts to ponder....

>  How can you help someone who will not even help themselves?

>  How do you know you cannot do something if you haven't even tried?

>  How can you have an "open mind", if you are continually thinking negatively?

>  Why do you think that YOU cannot make a difference... by just doing one NICE thing randomly each day?

>  How can you look outside, and NOT KNOW the GLORY of GOD?  HE is everywhere!

>  Why do you not think that you are important, if you think that everyone else is?

>  How on Earth can you NOT chase a Rainbow?  ....  :/

>  Why is it that we have to wait 'til we are OLDER to realize so many things that we wish we had known "then"?  

>  How do we even think that WE can help someone else if they cannot help themselves? 

> How can it be that "we have a friend that feels closer than a brother"?  Isn't "blood thicker than water"?  

>  How can relatives FIGHT over money, when they have just lost a loved one?

>  Why don't we give ourselves the same kindnesses that we show others with?  

>  Why do the little things that bothered me once, not mean an ounce of difference to me today?

>  Why is it that it is the "LITTLE THINGS" (different kind of  little things than mentioned above) that mean the most?   

>  Why do we feel that we wanna go back, but not make the same mistakes again?  

>  Do we not realize that our Lives would be totally changed, if we did the above? 

>  Why does it feel that Time has passed soooo quickly, while on the other hand, it wasn't really that long ago?

>  Why is it that some people do not even open their blinds every day, and let the SUN SHINE IN?  

>  How can I not realize that THIS LIST could go on forever?  

..... to be continued..... 

"PURE-T STRESS"

I've been sick for two days.  Sick in the bed, sick.  Though no fevers, no coughs, or colds, or anything like that.  Just pure-T "STRESS".   It made me weak, it made me anxious, it made my skin feel like it was crawly, I didn't feel much like eating.  I couldn't concentrate, I couldn't talk really well, without stammering and just unable to get out the words at times. I felt really nervous.  It made me not want to get dressed, or take a shower, or do much of anything at all.  I drank my coffee, not much could make not want to do that.  But even though I had my amount of caffeine I felt like my mind was foggy, I couldn't keep focused. I kinda felt like I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry, but couldn't.  I felt like my chest was tight, and it was hard to breathe.  I just felt almost sick to my stomach, but not really queasy.  I just totally felt very uneasy.  I've been having some mild dizziness, but for two days that even seemed to be worse.  I could have cared less if did anything for those two days.  They were wasted.  But yet they weren't.  I had to get rejuvenated, I had to restock, regroup, what ever ya wanna call it.  I had to seriously do some thinking.... what has caused this, what can I do about it, and how should I handle it.  Sick, yes, I felt sick, though maybe not in the usual way.  But sick, nevertheless.  ILL. Outta-body weirdness, hearing things around me, but not really listening at all. Sitting and staring at the wall, or out into the marsh, or up at the sky.  Why?  Well, I say it was STRESS.  You say, Stress?  How on earth can that make ya feel those things?  Well wouldn't we all like to know.   I do know this...that everything we do, everything we experience, every interaction we have with our loved ones, our friends, and others..... affects us in many ways.  Of course most things affect our physical being, in one way or another, and that is usually visible. But do we really stop and think about how everything affects our nervous system?   Naaah... not really.   But why wouldn't it?  Our nervous system is a large portion of what makes up our bodies, and is a very, very important part of our make-up, although it can't be seen as the physical body can.  So therefore it makes it hard to see those things that cause us STRESS as affecting our nerves, but it all does affect all parts of our bodies. Our minds are very complex. Our hearts are tough, but they are tender as well.  STRESS can make us feel like hell.  

So where does STRESS come from?  I didn't Google it to see.. but maybe I will, later.... however, I am finding out it can come from many avenues,  anything... maybe a person, a place, or a thing, depending on the time or circumstance.  We don't really think about STRESS, because we are just going through Life, day by day, moment my moment, never stopping to think much about it.  'Til one day.... bam... you are down for the count.  You are out light a light.  You are good for nothing.  You are worn out, you are frazzled, you are torn and totally mixed up about why you are feeling this way.... No coughs, no sneezing, or wheezing... or fevers... (for me anyway) you just know you are not well......maybe you are feeling STRESSED.  Just as being sick in any other way, you have to take care of yourself, when sick with STRESS.  It feels a little weird, I must say, to just be in bed, (pretty much all day, or two...) because you don't feel like the kind of sick you would normally be to stay in bed, but you don't feel up to doing anything else.  Weak as water, not able to concentrate.  It is awful, it is insane that your nervous system could wreak so much havoc in this way that would just put you down.  But it can, and it did.  I am still having a tough time, wondering how to deal with it, how to help myself now get over this STRESS.  STRESS can also sometime be the precursor to Heart Attacks, as it was in the case of my sister's. Her doctor said it was.  I do not want to have a Heart Attack, oh no, I do not. (I am predisposed already from having them "in the family", but I need not add to that, to make my chances greater.)  

No one really thinks about hey.... I am getting STRESSED, not generally. It usually just kinda creeps up on ya, after being exposed to certain stimuli, over time and again......And you feel like Crap... you don't wanna get outta bed, you cannot think clearly, you want to cry but you can't.  STRESS is not our friend, in normal ways. (we all know there are times when a little stress is needed .... that is a different kind of stress, and not applicable here.)

Where does it, the bad-kind of STRESS come from and ..... I don't even think I can begin to talk about what causes that STRESS. Sometimes we do not know, we don't recognize anything different. Then other times, when we stop and think.... ahhhhh... yeah.... that was/is pretty stressful... maybe I need to rethink what I'm doing that may be causing this.  Many times it can start to grow from the circumstances of another, you take on their burdens, because you are concerned, you sometimes worry, and you care, and you share, then BOOM... it feels like their problems are yours, or you sympathize so much with a friend or loved one, and you feel their STRESS 'til it winds up on your back, in your heart, in your mind! Oh yeah.  This is where I'm at.  I cannot deal with that kind of STRESS any longer.  I have to back away.  I have to regain my inner peace somehow. I cannot live with this kind of STRESS, not and function to the best of my ability.  
Ok...  well, I am very sleepy.  I need to rest, and DE-STRESS.   Good night.  <3 ~me

Suthern Chics Nite Out.......

Hey there my gurls, 

you

Sweet Suthern Chics... 
y'all listen up,
my gurls
y'all heah?  

I don't even know what day it is...
don't know which a'way is up, 
or is it 
upside down? 
All I do know
gurls, 
y'all gotta help me gurls....  
we gotta turn my frown around!                                                                 

Some of us were Suthern Bound, the 

rest of us... we were Suthern Bred,

all I knows right now, is gurls...

we're a'headin' straight ahead...

maybe downtown gurls?  .. 

or elsewhere gurls...

 where'd

y'all like to go instead? 

Ok, now gurls

 what do you think ...

Should we rev up the

 Pink Cadillac..

 or

maybe the convertible, gurls, 

y'all know, that RED one... 

the one that sits

out back!

  

Whoa now... wait 

a minute y'all... 

I've got to 
Fix My 

Face...

calm down, gurls... 
wait up, 

we are fixing to, 

jes' hold on gurls... 
purdy soon we'll be a'leavin' this place.

Well, lawdy be, and la-de-da... 

Whooo hooo, and yahoo too...

This is what we Suthern gurls do,

 y'all know... 

when we's  a'feelin' blue.

Soooo.... let's put that top down, 
and  

tie your scarf right on, 

ya head.... 

if y'all don't wanna 

your coif's a'blowin'...

  betta

listen to me, I said... 

there'll be'a wind, 
sho' nuff, 

I know...
just up 

that road ahead!

Come on now gurls......

 let's go, 
you chics,  

 and Suthern gals,

 yes,

 each and all of you....

I said.... Come on y'all...

  Honey chil', and Darlin' heart, 
  come on gurls,
    now you two...

    but say 
      hey y'all.....
   have yas
     seen our friend,
       Miss Bobbie Sue?

At last, we Suthern chics, 

each one of us, and all...
oh yeah,
we are'a come'n boys... 

we gurls are a'headin' out,   

oh yeah, and oh yeah boy... 
yoooo hoooo ..... 

but wait.... 

oooohhhh noooo 

 hold up ..... 
  hold on ....
  back up...
     did we leave sweet 

       Betty Lou?  

Just a little bit about a "Little Bit"

I am married to the love of my life,
my high school sweetheart for 42 years.
He is the Best, and always was, 
through many and many (and many) a TEST. 
We've been together through the good times,
though many times of tears, 
oh Lord, what would I do without him, 
I shudder to think....with him I have no fears.
Together we have borne two daughters, 
named Dana and named Erin, 
the days they arrived, we truly felt a bit of Heaven.
Now, today...
I am NeNe and he is Papa, 
to the sweetest
of sweet Grandsons,
William Thomas,
and brother, 
Jacob Elliott Frasier..,
oh yes, the days that they arrived,  
we thought we surely 
had GONE to Heaven!.

 I love a sunrise or a beautiful sunset....
 the beach, the ocean waves, and the noise that the sea makes.
 I love the sounds of the bird's songs, or a cloudy afternoon. 
 I love a rainy day, chasing rainbows and full moons. 
 I like hand-holding, and hugs given with true warmth, 
 a soft touch, 
 or sitting by a fire upon a hearth.
 I am into some music, sometimes I like to dance, 
 I love how it feels to be in love and  
 I also like romance.
 I love little babies and the way they smell right after a bath, and
 I like to know that Life is full of many, varied paths. 

 I feel blessed beyond all measure, 
 and I'm very thankful to God,
 for I know without HIM, I might only be....sod?!? 
 I love the green grass, 
 and too, the crunchy Autumn leaves, 
 and the shadows that WE make
 when we are walking down a street.  

These things are only but a few,
 of the things, and the loves
 that make Me.. ME, 
 and
 helps make 
 me feel, 
 most times... 
  well....  just complete!  

Getting started... my first blog... July 31, 2013

Welll, y'all.... here I am~!  My very first line on my Blog.  I had a "time" trying to just find a name for this blog, seemed like all of the first things I came up with were taken. So then, I turned to a friend, who has pushed me (lovingly) to this point, and asked for some suggestions... SHE came up with the title I really liked, LAUGHTER, TEARS AND SUNSHINE! I think it fits for me, whatta ya think? As well, I feel it is very apropos, to have chosen this, since she IS the one who prompted me to do this blogging thing. (Thank you, Peggy!) Yes, throughout my life, there have been a few others who have always told me to WRITE! Even one or two who have said, "You could write a book!". (Thank you, Mary Jane!) Well, that is still a dream, but now I'm wondering... may be a possibility?  Well, let's just keep it simple now, as I try to write lines of what ever is coming out of my mind.... MAYBE SOME DAY.... a book?  Now THAT WOULD BE AWESOME!  Thank you to all of you, and I think you know who you are, for always telling me that I should WRITE!

I have been writing in some form or fashion, since I was "knee-high to a door knob".  I have bits of paper, here and there, and un-finished journals in this or that box, SOMEwhere.  I thought .... do I have to collect all of those, and start from THERE? Ohhh gosh, I would never have gotten to this point. So, my friend says..."just start from now", and write what you want... soooo here we go.  

I sometimes may write tooooo much, or maybe not enough (????) but always I will write from my heart. I hope that what I write may help someone else, in some way, and I also hope that what I write will never hurt anyone, in any way.  But I want you to know right here, right now... all I write just comes from my heart! It may come from my experiences or others, but I will always do my very best not to embarrass anyone, or hurt anyone, by my words.  That old saying, "Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but WORDS will never hurt me."... No way, NOT TRUE!  Words can and do hurt sometimes when said in the wrong way, at the wrong time, or maybe just taken in the wrong context.  It is not easy to write so that the other person can truly know your intent, completely, because they are reading the words as they would, not necessarily how you would want them to sound, so I gotta remember these things, so as not to hurt with my words.  That all being said, if anything you read that I write, does hurt, just write me a private note, and let me know, and we will work it out.  I will always try to protect the innocent, as they say, and try not to cause trouble or discord between others with my words! Now then, all THAT being said.... 

Please BEAR WITH ME.... although not real new at writing, I am certainly new with writing so that others can read what I write. I hope that sometimes you will be able to read between the lines, or understand maybe what I cannot put into words.  Writing is sometimes easy, sometimes not!  Sometimes I get to going, and my fingers get way ahead of my mind.  Whew!  Was I ever glad for the typewriter!  And now the COMPUTER!  I still love LONG-HAND writing, but my old fingers just can no longer hold out. This way I can write and erase and adjust and rewrite, and lo and behold hopefully when all is said and done (or written and erased and rewritten) it will show up here as I want it to!  

As you see by now.... I am a TALKER! ... even as I talk, I write.... LOTS or much!  haha... Maybe sometimes too much.... rarely not enough.  So if you get tired of all the blah, blah, blah... take a break and come back... please.  BEAR WITH ME... some days I may keep it short!  Whatever the case... here I am with my FIRST BLOG... feels kinda like I am writing a book. I can hear you now... "IT sure does! Will this first entry ever be finished?"

Ok, ok... for now I will stop. But only because I reeeally should get up and get dressed and do something else, I guess.  But I have a feeling my laptop and I are going to be even better friends now that I have this blog going. Poor laptop, I'll do my best to keep you coooool! Whew! But when the words flow they flow. Gotta write when it's HOT! (Alright, I will jot down notes and thoughts from time to time on paper and give you a break, Laptop!) 

Thanks to all of you have been patiently reading this. Know that your love and encouragement means more to me than I can ever say. But if you will, keep it coming, ok?  I will need it some days to keep this up. On those days, consider yourself HUGGED! TTFN = Ta Ta Ta For Now... you will be hearing alot of that too!  Blessings,  <3 ~me